Every day, I go about a hundred miles a minute from the minute I step out of bed. I thought if I started wearing my FitBit again, I’d easily put in my 10,000 steps a day, but I actually found out that I had more steps to go, which is ludicrous considering how sore my body feels by the end of the day. No, I hit the ground running and I never quite stop until the kids go to bed. Raising two children (nevermind the fact that one of them has autism), working as a special education teacher in a purely resource setting, and trying to take care of our four pets makes for a busy life. What can a busy person like me put off doing in order to make life easier? Well, I know that I put off doing 8 things every single day!
- Getting out of bed. Oh wait, that’s just an avoidance tactic. That actually just makes life harder. Oops. I don’t know why I persist in this habit, though. It’s okay. I just blame my children for my tardiness.
- Exercising. I need it to do it, but I rarely make time for it. Except for today, snitches! That step goal? Nailed it! Yeah!
- Reading emails from people I don’t like. Oh…it’s you again? Pass….until later, I guess. Sorry, colleague.
- Conflict. Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful. Or something like that. I mean, really. My life is filled with enough strife. I’ve got a child with autism, a child that’s almost 4 who thinks he’s a teenager (I mean, sooo emotional), fibromyalgia, endometriosis, and cysts on my ovaries. I’ve got to deal with my kids emotions and pains all over my body. The last thing I need another pain in the you-know-what. Am I right? I put off conflict as long as possible. Let’s just avoid it altogether, honestly.
- Cleaning the litter box. I think my cat has a bladder problem. I know humans who don’t pee that much.
- Homework time. Oh, please, don’t make me. My son makes this face when he doesn’t want to try. It’s like this open-mouthed contortion, but just with his face–like he’s deeply in pain. I’m very familiar with it. I fight with this look every time its homework time. It’s immediately followed by a fish-flop to the floor. Sometimes, if I do something silly like put the pencil eraser in his ear or pretend I’m going to stick something up his nose, I can snap him out of it and we’ll resume work. If I’m exhausted too, though, Lord help us both. I hate writing-intensive nights because the contortionistic fish-flops only get worse.
- Eating. I honestly just feel like I have better things to do than eat. If I didn’t have children to feed at home or, sometimes, if my husband didn’t start dinner, I probably wouldn’t eat at all. I do get a little cranky when my blood sugar drops, but I just push on because paperwork needs to get done, or something needs to get written, or I just don’t feel like heating myself up anything to eat.
- Sleeping. So I should go to bed right now, but I get a limited amount of time where I can actually write in peace. I finished doing what I needed to get done for work, the television got turned off, and now I get to write without distraction. So I’m up past my bedtime, and I sacrifice precious hours of sleep every night. I shouldn’t do it, but what can I do? I either sacrifice my sleep or time I get to write without limit. So, write on? I don’t know the answer, but here I am.
Maybe putting things off doesn’t lead to the greatest outcome, but sometimes we choose what fits into our lives and what doesn’t from moment to moment. For now, I guess I’m doing what I can to get by. I could probably do things differently. I could go to bed earlier, get up earlier, exercise more, eat better, and perhaps live less in fear of conflict. For now, I’m doing what I can handle, though. Maybe tomorrow I’ll nail my step goal again and I’ll begin to work in more exercise. I cannot promise I’ll ever get more sleep, but maybe I can drag myself out of bed sooner. Who knows. I just know that there’s only so much stress, pain, and life that one person can fit in. Sometimes I feel my cup is full of too much of all of it, so I compensate in my own way.
[ctt tweet=”Sometimes life is too full not to put some things off http://ctt.ec/Afec2+ #balancingact #autism @embracespectrum” coverup=”Afec2″]