Everyone shows love differently (at least there’s a book out there that says so). We all also have our own “Love Language” if you believe Gary Chapman. In case you’re wondering, my primary love languages are Words of Affirmation and Quality Time (it’s a tie!). I like feeling appreciated and when someone spends time with me, I want to know they’re really with me.
Would it surprise you to know that I show love by trying to give people what I want (more with my children than anyone)?
10 Things I Do To Show Love
- I say it. “I Love You.” Simple. What if I never said it? Would you know? Maybe. Some people say actions speak louder than words, but other people just don’t know how to read body language. I tell my children a thousand times a day that I love them. One day they’ll grow up, become teenagers, and cringe when I tell them. But, at least they’ll know. My husband and I tell each other maybe a little less than that, but we say it every time we hang up, leave each other, go to bed, etc. You never know when you won’t see someone again. Just say it.
- I’m not a touchy-feely person. Just ask my husband. So, if I let you hug me, I love you. My children get hugs all-day-long. And the kisses? Oh my goodness. Slobber factories, the both of them, but they’re my babies. Again, one day they’ll be teenagers (God Help Me) and they’ll never want to kiss my cheek again. Or my hand. Or my nose.
- When you’re in trouble, I’m there, ready to spring to action. Screw my agenda. I’ll drop whatever I’ve got going to help someone I love if they’re in crisis mode and I have the ability to help.
- On the same token, God help the person who messes with the ones I love. I’m probably the meekest person you’ll ever know until you cross someone I love. Something in me comes out, though, and I may not get physical, but I know what I need to do to protect someone I love.
- If you want me around, I’m there. Really there. I listen, and I care about what you have to say. Life has taken a very busy turn lately and I’ve not had much time for fostering friendships, but with my children, it’s simply meant that if Squeaker says, “There’s a dinosaur! It’s real!” I’m so intuned to what his wants and needs and likes are that I know he wants me to yell out “Everybody panic!” so that he can get a good laugh and then tell me, “It’s okay! I was just kidding!” When they speak and I can’t hear them, I turn down the radio. It matters.
- I do what I say I’m going to do. If I promise I’m going to show up, I’m going to show up. So maybe sometimes I’m late, but I’m there. Commitments are important – I will not abandon a loved one.
- If I hurt you, I will apologize and I will mean it. Trust me, I never say “I’m sorry” unless I mean it. You can ask my parents how well I lie (terribly). I would never hurt someone I love on purpose. Honestly, I generally don’t like to hurt anyone, but hurting someone I truly care about hurts on a much deeper level.
- And on that note of hurting people…the chances of my deeply hurting someone I love? Not very high. I would rather keep myself in inner turmoil than cause someone I love pain. I think that’s why marriage can be so hard. You live with someone for so many years that you’re bound to argue once in a while and it causes pain. For me, that pain feels almost unbearable, and it’s not just because he’s hurt my feelings. I can honestly almost take that more than knowing when I’ve hurt his. No, you can pretty much count on me always wanting to keep the peace.
- If you call and I’m not at work, I’m probably going to answer. If my children aren’t killing each other and you need me, you’ve got my attention. Heck, if they’re about to kill each other and my husband’s home and you’re in need, I’ll have him prevent the homicide so we can talk or divide and conquer. (Sorry, honey–Love you!!)
- Last, but not least, if I love you, you will see the real me sometimes. I’ll let my guard down. I’ll trust you a little. Then, I’ll hope that you love me enough to show love the same way I’ve shown you.